Don’t Touch The Bugles Podcast
36 - I’m going to relate to myself as Translender

36 - I’m going to relate to myself as Translender

October 13, 2019

The man more Fen than the Strawbear himself, @chunkybugle, is your host for episode 36 of Don't Touch The Bugles.

It's the usual random chat to start this weeks' episode and talk soon turns to Teddy's impending knee operation. It's probably time to put your sandwich down when you listen to this as it gets squeamish at one point. Anyway, by the sounds of it, in the near future we'll be recording this podcast whilst emptying his bedpan and fluffing his pillows!!

Angelo then asks the question the whole population can relate to......have you ever pulled a sickie from school or work? I'm not saying The Bugles would do such a thing but the words 'fake dentist appointment, go-karting, Edinburgh, Nottingham, going on strike and faking an injury to catch a flight' appear in this section of the episode.

Diddly provides the group with a bit of dashboard porn before he hosts another round of The Bugles League which takes us to the half way point of the competition.

Ellwood then asks what song gets you most pumped up and willing to run through a brick wall? (WARNING: don't try this at home, make a mess at someone else's house instead). No doubt you'll have heard of some of these classic head boppers, whilst others will get you reaching for an old copy of your Encarta '95 CD for reference. The Bugles even talk through the first cassette or CD they first ever purchased. We'll say no more!

Finally, it's everyone's favourite news update, it's Weird Shit of the Week which includes tales of urinals being banned, horseplay by a teen, a stag do stitch up, a VAR machine not working in the Saudi football league and a very fake heart attack.

Download, listen and share this fun filled, 6 man episode of Don't Touch The Bugles podcast.

This week's episode was brought to you by: @chunkybugle, @angelobugle, @jiggsofbugle, @vancan41, @alexdiddly and @teddypaling.

35 - There was some guy sitting in a tree with binoculars

35 - There was some guy sitting in a tree with binoculars

October 6, 2019

He's back, fresh from two weeks cruising around the motherland, @alexdiddly is your host for episode 35 of Don't Touch The Bugles podcast.

So where do things start this week? Well, it's the place that separates the men from the boys, the wheat from the chaff and the smart from the.....anyway, its The Bugles League and @chunkybugle is your quiz master.

There's a quick review of Diddly's wedding now that he's back with the Bugles including a recap of Angelo's music fuck up on the day and the moment everyone has been waiting a lifetime for, to meet Diddly's Poppa. Diddly then shares tales from his honeymoon including the rudeness of people in airports, getting stopped at security, taking the wrong direction on a walk to the beach and cleaning his trainers to make them "fem fresh". 

Someone disrespects the DTTB badge whilst Angelo was away on holiday whilst a different passenger held the flight up. 

Chunk tells of his new fitness regime before it's onto Weird Shit of the Week which this week includes gold toilets, farting criminals, a potty milestone and McDonalds-gate.

As ever, all this and much more from the best podcast on the planet*.

This weeks episode is brought to you by @alexdiddly, @chunkybugle, @teddypaling and @angelobugle]

*may contain lies

34 - Sloppy and moist are two words I don’t like

34 - Sloppy and moist are two words I don’t like

September 29, 2019

Is it just us or do these podcast titles keep getting worse? Ah well, fuck it.....they seem to grab your attention and hey, we won't judge if you don't! The Captain himself, @vancan41, is here to host the latest episode of Don't Touch The Bugles podcast.

From the off, Angelo gets a battering for his 'tidy' ways and the levels of his OCD are brought into question. Actually, here's one for all of you listeners. When does an OCD trait start to become a superstition? The Bugles debate this and more and there's even a story of a guy who only ever eats baked beans. 

The Bugles discuss how non-drivers love to tell drivers how to drive, reminiscing of a food fight down the A1, six lads topping 100mph in a 1 litre Toyota Yaris, fuel problems and road rage (shout out to Ronnie Pickering!).

This podcast is all about giving back and The Bugles talk about having a 'Bugles Charity Day'. Six strapping men offering their services to the world, to give something back to the community and to try and make a difference to those most in need. If you could use a service like this or know of someone who could, get in touch by contacting

There's the latest round of The Bugles League, this week hosted by Teddy, before an instalment of Weird Shit of the Week which this week includes stories of a $120,000 mistake and the strangest 'man of the match' award.....which of course comes from Russia!

If you enjoy this podcast, why not share it with others? Pass the podcast and help us grow!

This week's podcast is brought to you by @vancan41, @angelobugle and @teddypaling



33 - Quarter to eight blow job

33 - Quarter to eight blow job

September 22, 2019

It's his lucky number but we're still not sure why (either that or we've forgotten!), that's right, @jiggsofbugle is back to host episode 33 of Don't Touch The Bugles podcast.

The guys start this week with a tip of the cap to Diddly's wedding but don't worry, they save a full run down until the main man is back from his Honeymoon is Sardinia. Talk moves onto winning the lottery and how each of The Bugles would spend and/or share it. Jiggs reveals he has a doppelgänger - at least according to this phone - before he talks about a trip to Humberside with his work colleagues. There's more strange happenings on the UK roads as two more weird and wonderful sites are seen by some of the guys. 

Angelo reveals that his package is exposed for all to see (we'll say no more) and they each share some incidents that have involved delivery drivers going rogue with their parcels.

The Bugles each reveal the TV programs they can't stand watching and they then talk about a truly cringe worthy porno scene that was shared in their What's App group recently. Dear god is horrifically funny!

Finally, the latest round of The Bugles League is back.....who will be the movers and shakers in this weeks episode?

As ever, it's all of this and more from your favourite bunch of friendly reprobates. Open a packet of Bugles, kick back, relax and laugh.

This week's podcast is brought to you by @jiggsofbugle, @teddypaling, @vancan41 and @angelobugle 

32 - I had my trousers around my ankles

32 - I had my trousers around my ankles

September 15, 2019

@teddypaling is back from a three week absence to host episode 32 of Don't Touch The Bugles.

The guys start this week with Teddy explaining where he has been during his time away from recording which included a trip to the land of multiple coloured sands, a drive up to the home of his nemesis and a lay up in bed with a rash. Chunk reveals how his 6 year old had to help him get into the local library and Angelo gives us an update on his German Majorca, before sharing a new game he plays on Facebook's Marketplace. See @buglespodcast on Instagram for visuals.

This week's main topic is 'First Cars'. Yes, whether it was a Fiat Panda or a Ferrari, your first car is always your pride and joy and when you're young, it's a pride of joy you decorate so poorly, it looks like "Smiley, Smiley" Carol Smillie has been working on it during an episode of 90's TV show Changing Rooms. The Bugles each share theirs before delving into those of the listeners.

There's another round of The Bugles League before moving onto Weird Shit of the Week which includes stories involving people doing things they really shouldn't whilst driving, impersonating someone twice your age so you can use their passport and perfume you won't find in Boots any time soon.

Don't forget to leave a review for Don't Touch The Bugles on iTunes and of course, 'pass the pod' to a friend or relative.

This week's podcast is brought to you by @teddypaling, @chunkybugle and @angelobugle

31 - Why do people do that?!

31 - Why do people do that?!

September 8, 2019

Poppa Diddly's heir to the throne, @alexdiddly, is back to host episode 31 of Don't Touch The Bugles, the podcast where six brothers from other mothers chew the fat on the most random of topics.

In typical, unscripted fashion, the guys start this weeks show with a treat from overseas as Diddly manages to get his Mediterranean hands on some non-standard flavours of everyones favourite cone shaped snack and the inspiration to the name of this podcast, it's Bugles! A pop song of old dedicated to everyone's favourite fake Mexican, Angelo, is shared with the group before his birthday gift reveal, part 2, commences. An invention from Diddly's Poppa goes worldwide and makes a TV appearance, there's an 18 mile bike ride with mega frustrations and an update on Teddy's charity ride too. Ellwood tells us all about his open and itchy gash, Chunk tells all about his 80's and 90's rave and there's a new king of the tea (not something we ever thought we'd talk about on here!)

The Bugles League is back with a brand new jingle too and then its onto this weeks topic which is 'first and worst gigs'. Wow, listen up for some horrors!

Finally, it's Weird Shit of the Week which this week includes Robot strippers, a Spanish drugs raid and a builder doing a shitty job!

As ever, all this and more so download, share and enjoy.

This week's episode is brought to you by @angelobugle, @jiggsofbugle, @chunkybugle, @vancan41 and @alexdiddly 

30 - I don’t trust anyone with thin lips

30 - I don’t trust anyone with thin lips

September 1, 2019

Don't Touch The Bugles has hit another milestone everyone and this time it's the big 3-0, that's right.....The Bugles have managed to squeeze out every last drop of bullshit they have into 30 episodes and there'll be plenty more of where that came from so buckle up and enjoy, as @angelobugle is hosting.

There's a very heartfelt and poignant message from Jiggs to start this week's episode and we urge you to listen to his very wise words carefully. Don't forget, it's always OK to ask for help and it's always OK not to be OK. If you don't have anyone to talk to, we sincerely mean it when we say, reach out to The Bugles for someone to share a problem with. 

Then the guys recap on their week which includes talk of the annual Bugles and Buglettes summer bash. This year, there's a game which involved Diddly face planting the ground, Angelo's weak arm is exposed, Chunk dropping balls on his face and Ellwood paying someone to 'lick the cricket'.

Angelo talks about another stupid impulse buy from the weekend, Jiggs had a new claim to fame only weeks after the guys revealed all theirs, there's an update from a Bugle who recently went Glamping and the guys each share their life mottos.

It's then onto this week's topic which is 'What would you put into room 101?'. This is the chance for the Bugles to convince one another that they have something so annoying, it should be banished and never to be seen again. There's even listener nominations - and some bloody good ones too!

Enjoy as ever and listen again next week for more from your favourite podcast.

P.s. - check out our YouTube channel for our new monthly behind the scenes video. Just search for Don't Touch The Bugles on YouTube.

This week's episode is brought to you by @angelobugle, @jiggsofbugle, @chunkybugle, @vancan41 and @alexdiddly 

29 - Is it any fucking wonder?!

29 - Is it any fucking wonder?!

August 25, 2019

@JiggsofBugle is your host this week as The Bugles are back at Podcast HQ for another episode of your favourite show.

Things start with a flashback to last weeks show as some late 'Claim to Fame' entries from listeners are read out before The Bugles each discuss who the most famous celebrity they've physically met before is. 

There's a Salt and Vinegar crisp debate, talk about two rappers (just to be clear, that's rappers not wrappers!) and then out of the blue, another Bugle turns up......along with a cryptic message from his dad. You can probably guess which Bugle it is but can you work out what Poppa was saying?

It's one of the Bugles birthday and a surprise gift opening takes place before things move onto the main topic this week. Now you need to listen carefully to this bit because it could happen in real life and the guys have you sorted should that ever happen. The topic this week is 'how to survive a zombie apocalypse. Just a little warning for you, don't follow @angelobugle's ideas, some would say they're a tad on the unrealistic side of things!

Finally, it's Weird Shit of the Week which this week includes stories involving sex prevention toilets, a Thai chef who went AWOL on his way home, Donald Trump being Donald Trump and there's a Cabbage-gate update.

All this and much much more from the fanatics of crunchy cone shaped snacks, which this week included @chunkybugle, @jiggsofbugle, @alexdiddly and @angelobugle 


28 - He’ll buy a cast iron dildo from the 1800’s…

28 - He’ll buy a cast iron dildo from the 1800’s…

August 18, 2019

We're on the fun bus again this week as the Bugles take a trip down the road from Podcast HQ to Casa Ellwood as the Canadian wanabee, @vancan41, is back to host episode 28.

There's no maple syrup on show for this episode but the guys do get off to a sweet start by chowing through some mammoth sized doughnuts whilst Angelo heads back to podcast HQ to get some of the vital recording equipment he forgot. What a douche!

As ever, it's another random catch up of the week gone by including Ellwood's rejected dinner date and a Bugles golfing day out which resulted in them being eaten alive by mozzies. Ouchie! There's an update on the Don't Touch The Bugles podcast YouTube channel (go check it out by the way!) and whilst we're getting digital, listeners of episode 27 will remember Jiggs put a half eaten tub of Marmite on Ebay. Did it sell? On that note, the Bugles come up with a mini Ebay challenge of their own but we won't say what it is....find out in this episode.

Teddy talks about a previous run in with the boys in blue - no, not his beloved Everton but rather the long arm of the law!

Finally, the guys get onto their 'claims to fame' which include being on TV, being on the radio, being in the newspaper and the most obvious one, being a Bugle! 

Please, please support this independent podcast by leaving us a review on iTunes, Podbean, Spotify or any other platform you listen to Don't Touch The Bugles podcast. 

Download your way to another hour of fun, this week brought to you by @vancan41, @chunkybugle, @teddypaling, @jiggsofbugle and @angelobugle

27 - I’d been cabbaged!

27 - I’d been cabbaged!

August 11, 2019

@chunkybugle is back to host episode 27 of your favourite podcast - well we hope it is!

This weeks show starts with Chunk's new look and let's just say, we have two celebrities on hand to help you work out who he looks like. Talk then turns to another device eaves dropping on one of the Bugles, Area 51 and the Bugles being described as "British as fuck!". There's also an exclusive opportunity to buy a *world famous piece of Don't Touch The Bugles podcast memorabilia from eBay! One of the Bugles shares a prank he was at the end of this week and there is also a debate on how much the tooth fairy should pay out. 

Then it's onto this weeks big topic which is Heroes and Idols. The guys each share theirs however this part of the podcast comes with a disclaimer as unbeknown to the Bugle loving boys, there seems to be a weird noise.....almost like an electrical current running through them? Either that or a ghost has taken over! Anyway, apologies in advance but it soon sorts itself out.

Finally, the guys wrap things up with another round of weird shit of the week.

Download and enjoy another hour of man-childish carnage brought to you this week by @chunkybugle, @teddypaling, @jiggsofbugle, @alexdiddly and @angelobugle.

*May contain lies